We all want to be attractive to other people – not just physically attractive, but in every aspect. I know that I like to be liked and valued. I hope that people want to be around me and enjoy my presence. Every healthy person desires to be enjoyed and wanted. Let me share some things that I’ve learned and observed about living an attractive lifestyle.
Love Yourself
It’s very difficult to be attractive to other people if you don’t love yourself. It’s never fun to be around someone who is always making negative comments about themselves and hoping that someone will rescue them from their own thoughts and dislikes about who they are. If you don’t love yourself, you can’t love other people well. You learn to love yourself when you start to understand how God feels about you. So ask Him. Start enjoying who you are. Stop worrying what other people think of you. Many more people will enjoy you when you are fully yourself. Don’t try to be someone else. It’s too much work and it’s not fun to be around someone that’s trying to act like you. They hung out with you in the first place because you had something different to offer than anyone else. Look in the mirror and say, “I am amazing. I really like myself.” When you like who you are, then you will want to give the same thing to other people.
Value Yourself
This could be in the same category as loving yourself, but I see some differences that I wanted to separate it. Know that you are worth something. First and foremost, Jesus died for you. You were worth the life of God. I really could just stop there, but I have more to say. Jesus had a few close friends that he only shared certain parts of his heart with. He didn’t take all his valuable things inside himself and throw them out to just anyone. This is different than serving the poor, healing the sick, and loving the sinners. Don’t stop and say that you can’t give your time because it’s too valuable. By this, I mean don’t give away the deep things of your heart to everyone. Let me say it clearly. You CAN’T be everyone’s best friend. You can’t be the most important person in every relationship. Okay, take a deep breath. It’ll be okay. Learn to set boundaries in relationships. Think of who is most important to you and let that manage your relational time. Let people know you are valuable. It’s okay to choose to be best friends with only a few people. It’s okay not to be friends with certain people. Just love them. You don’t have to hang out with them all the time. Solution: Learn to say “No.”
Vision & Passion
Know what you want. People like to be around people who have vision. And not just people with a vision, but people with passion as well. You don’t want to be around someone who is apathetic and has no clue where they are going. You want to be around people who are living life with a purpose and will carry you to a higher place. If you don’t have passion, get around passionate people. If you can’t find passionate people, read books about passionate people. If you don’t know how to read, listen to books on tape. Ask God for supernatural passion to be ignited in you. Ask and it will be given. Start writing your passions down. Write down your goals and where you want to be in the next 5 or 10 years. Write down what you want your relationship with God to look like. What do you want your friendships and relationships to be like? Get a vision and passion, and people of like-heart will come around you.
Confidence
You can sense insecurity from a mile away. We want to be around people who are confident and don’t worry about what other people think. Confident people are more fun. Confident people are more positive. Guys, women are looking for confident men. The best part about being confident is that it’s not a big deal if a woman is uninterested in you if you like who you are. You just say, oh well, I guess it didn’t work out, that’s okay. Confidence comes from these three previous things. If you love yourself, you will be confident because you won’t worry about what other people are thinking about you. You won’t be wasting time trying to please people with fulfilling their desires because you will have a passion for your own vision.
These are some of the things that will help you live attractively. Talk to Jesus and talk to other people about these things if you need help.
Enjoy living attractively.
josh rech 